A while ago I attended a Personal Development seminar in London taught by Matthew Hussey and one thing I learned about was the "5 paralysers" that prevent you from achieving a goal.
For some reason I thought about this today and thought I'd share it with you guys as it relates to the daygame journey we're all on.So what are the "5 paralysers"?Overwhelm:
Overwhelm occurs when we see our goal as a mountain we have to climb. It makes us question our own ability to reach our goals. It can lead to procrastination as we are often too scared to take the first steps on the journey to achieving our goals.
This one is prevalent in daygame, especially for those guys starting out who have yet to do a direct approach in the daytime!Pain of Action:
Pain of action is the emotional or sometimes physical pain we encounter when we are trying to achieve a goal. E.g. physical pain during a marathon or emotional pain when trying to overcome confidence issues. We tend to become comfortable and decide that because we are comfortable we are happy. This is not the case as comfort is NOT happiness.
Again, another one that's prevalent in daygame especially for newbies. Approach anxiety falls under this.Risk:
Risk occurs to some extent every time we make a decision. For example the risk could be a financial, emotional or physical risk. Before making a decision we need to determine what is an acceptable risk e.g. how much money can I afford to lose before visiting the casino tonight? Risk can cause us to stall or even not attempt to reach our goals.
While daygame isn't inherently risky, we can often falsely attach risk to outcome e.g. "I better not approach because that guy walking near her might be her ninja boyfriend and kick my ass..."Lack of Clarity:
Lack of clarity occurs when we are not sure how to go about achieving our goals. We often have the big picture in mind but struggle to find a path to get there. This ties in with Overwhelm as it causes us to procrastinate and ultimately stops us from moving closer to achieving our goals.
Luckily we have this awesome resource that is daygame.com to all but remove this one. There is an abundance of material to help guys gain clarity as to how to get good at this stuff. Actually putting it into action is another matter entirely though...People:
People can be a great resource to us when trying to achieve a goal. They can also be the biggest hindrance. We must realise that there will be people in our lives that do not share our visions and are happy in their current situations. These people, whilst intentionally or not, can cause us to procrastinate and fail to reach our goals. Networking is extremely important, however many of us fail to ask for help or advice as we fear we aren't able to reciprocate the value given.
Wings are great, friend's telling you this stuff is weird are not. Don't be afraid to reach out for help but at the same time don't let the opinions of others become your reality.Overcoming the "5 paralysers"?Be realistic!
You're not going to achieve your goal overnight. Focus on the resources you have at your disposal and create a manageable plan. This will lead to sustainable action and ultimately move you closer to your goal!
Don't think you're going to be a daygame superstar in a week, it takes time and effort to get there but don't give up!Stop being a perfectionist!
You're not going to get it right first time, don't let the fear of failure stop you from taking action. Remember failure is inevitable throughout your life, it's how you learn and adapt from failing that will move you in the right direction!
Go and enjoy the blowouts as much as the successes.Embrace pain!
Logic alone will not push you to achieve your goals, you need to feel emotion to really drive you forward! Make the pain of not doing it worse..!
You want to meet and attract the girl of your dreams right?!Don't do it if you don't want it!
If you aren't bothered whether you achieve a goal or not, then don't waste your time in the first place! Emotion is the best fuel you can have so if you aren't passionate about the idea of daygame and the ability to meet women wherever and whenever you want then it will always remain a pipe dream.Find inspiration!
The world is full of people that are living their dreams. Use them as inspiration to show you that your goal is achievable. This can help us form a clear vision of what we want out of life and can fuel the emotion needed to fight the pain of action!
There are guys out there right now meeting and attracting the women they want in their life through this stuff alone. This could be you if you're willing to work for it! Network!
The more we network, the more we will be able to access people whom we can learn from. Find guys in your area that are already doing this and know what they're doing. It will fast track your learning process immensely!
So there you go guys, I hope you find this useful and can see how it applies to daygame as well as your wider goals!