Debate about direct mindset

[Paulkid]

I think in my most humble opinion that direct gaming is fun and all but... it isent all that amazing.

You`re basically killing off the fun and patience that girls are looking for, and the whole connection that you want to be building.
I think I needed to go through the whole direct thing to build up the confidence to say whatever the fuck I want...


I mean its all about calibration, but when you go direct on a chick, its a 50/50 thing. She can take it or leave it, she dident have the time to get to know you to see if she wants you or not.

Direct is amazing when you just want to fuck, at the end of the day you want to find a hot chick with an amazing personality to be there by your side right?

well like the recent podcast, direct/indirect is going amazing.

When you`re direct, you`re not really listening.
You`re just putting your intentions there and its a take it or leave it deal.

Not everyone is Allan roger currie and get the chick to suck your dick after 10mins of meeting her,
Not everyone is David X and can smell pussy when its wet by entering the room.

I recently found out chicks fall for you when you stand out of the crowd. You deliver your conversations with confidence, patience and don`t really show like the outcome is going to affect you thats what works best. Seriously the whole talking only about her, keeping conversations about you very short, listening and demonstrating intelligence but at the same time interest is the best bomb dropper. But its calibration after all, not everything works for every chick.

Daygame is bassically supposed about being confident to approach any girl you want, test her to see if shes right for you, if shes not want you want relationship wise, then go the whole david x on her and just tell her how much you want to fuck her lolll

But if you start like that in the begining your chances of the whole connection thing happening , are slim to none.

[Tony]

So what exactly do you want to accomplish with this thread? What part of the mindset would you like to discuss?
When I read your post it felt more like you needed to spill your frustrations about direct game because it might not have worked for you or something

Let me quote Alan Roger Currie. It's a comment he posted in a response to a similar subject on 'his' podcast page:

?Mode One is kind of an all or nothing approach.? EXACTLY. That is what any approach, in my opinion, SHOULD BE. ;-)

When I approach a woman, I want one of two things to happen: I want a woman to either enthusiastically reciprocate my desires and interests, or I want that woman to totally reject my interests. The problem with most men, is that they can?t handle the latter.

What I do NOT want to happen is for a woman to ?pretend? like she is interested in sharing my company, when in actuality, she is not. That is when you end up feeling angry, frustrated and bitter towards women in the long run. I don?t like to waste time pursuing a woman who is really not feelin? me.

Mode One is not synonymous with being ?sexually aggressive.? Mode One Behavior is behavior that is boldly confident, upfront, unapologetic, and straightforwardly honest.

[Paulkid]

What I want to approach with this is:

You loose a lot of good girls with mode one behavior.

Idk its so debatable what method you should actually apply, it all depends on what you want.

I got this internal conflict of : Continue mode one behavior, or start to play the patience game.
Mode one teaches you not to be manipulated.

Actually since I started being mode one, i saved money! Girls pay me stuff now
But its hard to get involved in a relationship and most chicks my age arent into the whole casual sex shit... so i gotta fkn adapt to the environment around me. I`m surrounded by alot of circle of friends that we have the whole female friends in it etc..
Mode one aint that good to play in your social circles when you`re in college.

[geo2010]

I haven't listened to the podcast yet, but there are pros and cons in each approach.
according to other pickup artists indirect is more consistent, because you have the chance to show your personality. direct is instant yes or no.
But there are also many types of direct. if you say "you are kinda cute, i would like to get to know you" and combine it with a bit of cocky-funny then it's ok imo.
However i understand, that women actually fall in love when they ask themselves "does he love me or not" and they want a man who is a challenge for them. so if you say it from the beginning "I like you" you kinda destroy this.
I am waiting for people's comments

[Metal Mike]

I've had good conversations with women after having opened them in the street by telling them something like "I think you look absolutely stunning.", then I just move into talking about her and well, trying to get her to qualify herself I suppose (still trying to learn how to do that with more consistency).

I learnt the hard way why you probably shouldn't go too direct in uni with someone in your group, however one thing I suppose that is worth trying is getting into a conversation with a girl in your class or uni peer group, talking to her a bit then saying something like "You know I really like talking to you, we should meet up sometime." I'd prefer someone clarify that because I've not really tried it (so if anything take my opinion here with a pinch of salt until someone says "YES, thats right." I think in it's own way this is still fairly direct without putting pressure on the girl, more or less that you like her but without coming on too strong. As I said, better to have someone say whether this is the right way to go in work/uni/social circle.

Honestly I do think being direct is a good thing because it helps filter out who's available, interested, uninterested etc. However social intelligence is perhaps a requirement depending on your situation, but being very direct works as a great way to get talking to a girl on the tube (in London), the street, on the train, having used it in all these situations. Oftentimes they have smiled and thanked me then chatted to me for a bit. So I'd say use your better judgement to deem what is appropriate.

[Rumba!]

I was the guy debating with Alan Roger Currie, on the podcast blog. I don't plan to start another slanging match over the Direct/Indirect debate, however my stance has been that I feel indirect works better in the day (particularly for guys new to the community/daytime gaming) as unless they have great natural body language/tone/confidence, then asking a girl "Mode One" direct will come across at best creepy or at worst threatening.
You can be direct with something like "I saw you walking by and had to come and say "Hi"; I'm Rumba!" but according to Mode One that's still not clear in your sexual intentions.
As I mentioned in my conversation with ARC, I think Mode One works well in bars/clubs as girls are there to have fun and meet guys, so going uber direct avoids the 3 hour "buy girl drinks/qualify for 2 hours/build comfort another hour/watch drunk Caveman snog her and pull her from venue" crap!
If you are a good looking, confident guy who can chat to girls and flirt with no probs, and want to meet a girl for sex, not relationships then go for ultra direct as it will indeed weed out any girls who aren't sure about seeing you again, but then how many of those "naturals" bother with the pickup community anyway!?!...

[Amazin]

well, if she's got a boyfriend or in a relationship, then ain't you wasting you time?

[craze6663]

well, if she's got a boyfriend or in a relationship, then ain't you wasting you time?

nope

[Soul:R]

well, if she's got a boyfriend or in a relationship, then ain't you wasting you time?

depends if your a dick or not,

or you can close her as a friend!

[craze6663]

well, if she's got a boyfriend or in a relationship, then ain't you wasting you time?

depends if your a dick or not,

or you can close her as a friend!

thats when you're wasting your time

[Alex love]

I think Indirect/direct is the only way to go, its fun, it allows you to stay flexible but still project sexuality quickly, it stops the situation from getting uncomfortable for the girl, it is the middle path...

[Charleston]

When you are walking down a crowded street and you see a hot girl, I think anything other than the direct approach feels unnatural. It feels like "there are hundreds of people on this street, but YOU just look like the sort of person that knows where Starbucks is".
I knew that direct was the style that I wanted to use most from the moment I saw the look on a girls face after going up to her and confidently delivering a direct line. It just lit up, like it was out of a movie or something. There was no BS and everything flowed very naturally, rather than talking about the problems of some non-existent friend. Ok, there were a few girls who just smiled, said "thanks" and carried on walking, but when that was literally the worst thing that happened to me, it really didn't seem to matter when I looked back at the good reactions.

On the other hand, in this case there is the benefit of never having to see the girl again if she isn't interested. For social circles, I'd like to know what this indirect/direct thing actually involves because at the moment its only been alluded to and I can see how being totally honest about my intentions could have a fairly negative effect at uni.

[Tony]

When you are walking down a crowded street and you see a hot girl, I think anything other than the direct approach feels unnatural. It feels like "there are hundreds of people on this street, but YOU just look like the sort of person that knows where Starbucks is".

Exactly!

I knew that direct was the style that I wanted to use most from the moment I saw the look on a girls face after going up to her and confidently delivering a direct line. It just lit up, like it was out of a movie or something.

It would be helpful if everyone that spoke about direct would give an example of 'their' directness. There are a lot of different (verbal) forms of being direct. I'm guessing you are complementing the girls and not asking them for a shag?

For social circles, I'd like to know what this indirect/direct thing actually involves because at the moment its only been alluded to and I can see how being totally honest about my intentions could have a fairly negative effect at uni.

Second that ^^

[Alex love]

Indirect/ direct is a concept first defined by skeletor (though its been used for thousands of years)

It means being direct in everything except actual words, which can be something very mundane, or my personal choice, very silly. You both know that you're hitting on her because you couldn't really be interested in the topic, but there is space in the interaction to sus each other out, without needing to force anyone to verbalise a decision on the spot.

For example, you approach a girl in a polka dot dress, stop her in her tracks look her deep in the eye with a big smile on your face and say 'Excuse me, I have to ask you about polka dots, are they cool? Its a very important question.....'

It works because it can be simultaneously very sexual, and also very low pressure and very fun, and most importantly she can keep talking to you without loosing any social value.

Good for cold approaches, social circle, anything. It's the only way to be...... 

[Charleston]

I knew that direct was the style that I wanted to use most from the moment I saw the look on a girls face after going up to her and confidently delivering a direct line. It just lit up, like it was out of a movie or something.

It would be helpful if everyone that spoke about direct would give an example of 'their' directness. There are a lot of different (verbal) forms of being direct. I'm guessing you are complementing the girls and not asking them for a shag?

I was using the more standard (and socially acceptable) direct, rather than Mode One direct. Stuff that goes along the lines of "hey, listen, I know this is really random/crazy, but I just saw you walking along, and I thought that you were really cute, so I just had to introduce myself"*. This isn't an exact "opener", but it generally followed that framework. If there was something I specifically noticed about the girl (eg. "I just really love short haired girls") or a really truthful compliment (eg. "your seriously the cutest girl I've seen today"), I'd include that. I remember in one of the podcasts, they said about a guy saying that he would show a girl his hands were shaking if they were. My hands weren't shaking, but there were a couple where I felt butterflys in my stomach, so I mentioned that.
I've not really tried the super up-front stuff yet*. However, I was listening to an interview with Badboy the other day, and one point he made was about being able to see the point in the interaction where there girl is turned on and continuing with indirect will do more harm than good, so you should go direct. So what I think I'll try in my next social interactions (including within social circles), is trying to get to that point, then "switcing on" the direct stuff. This is more along the lines of how my more natural friends do it.

*the way I approach doesn't seem to be total Mode One, but its hardly Mode Two either. Is there such a thing as Mode 1.5?
Saying that, ARC didn't say M1 necessarily means telling a girl you want to f them the moment you approach them. He talks about the importance of calibration (which I assume in a wider sense of the word also means having an idea of social decorum). M2 and M3 are more pretending you are not interested in a girl, so going up and saying she is cute and thats the reason that you stopped her can't count as that, so probably qualifies as M1.