Been thinking a bit more about this, and I'd like to break it down into further details, in case anyone is interested in the deeper theory behind choosing direct, indirect, or indirect/ direct. Skeletor was my mentor and I've had a lot of experience and coaching on indirect/ direct, so I'm biased towards that approach
When I got into the community, I came from the mindset that 'I have to talk a girl into liking me, because girls don't like me how I am. Once I've talked her into liking me I can ask her out'
As a result I wound up approaching tonnes of girls, but asking 'indirect' questions in the hope that I could fool them into thinking I wasn't actually chatting them up, long enough to convince them to like me (through DHV stories etc).
The problem with that approach is that women are by and large very well tuned in to our emotional states, and generally make an assumption that if a random guy starts talking to them he's hitting on them. Lets face it, its true
That's why people start having success when they go direct/ mode 1. The success comes from not trying to bullshit the girl, and she'll often appreciate it. It comes from
finally being authentic. Authenticity is the most attractive quality anyone can have. If a woman feels you are authentic she can feel safe with you, and you'll stand out as someone truly different.
However, it is also very high pressure for the girl. She has to make a decision there and then to begin a sexual relationship with you (even if you just ask her out - dates are inherently sexual interactions). She has to make a verbal commitment based on very little information.
So, if you are going to go completely direct/ mode one, its worth considering what other things you are displaying that a girl will have to make up her mind about you. It works best if
- You have big muscles
- You have expensive clothes
- You already have high social value in the venue that she will be aware of
OR
- You just happen to be her type
I'm a really skinny, pale, floppy haired guy with scruffy clothes and skin problems. My main attractive qualities are my sense of humour, my inner confidence, and my ability to love women (and my big hats). These are all qualities that she will pick up on quickly, but often
not before I've spoken to her.
Badboy is a big muscly guy with expensive clothes etc, so in his case, the girl will often be really interested before he even talks to her, so when he goes direct she'll be poised to say yes....
The advantage of indirect/direct is that it lets you display all you inner qualities, your energy, sense of humour etc in a way that isn't high pressure to the girl,
but is also authentic. At no point are you pretending not to be interested in the girl, if she asks if your interested you can be honest, but she wont ask, because you'll both know it.
I was fortunate enough to be asked to speak at a conference with Yad a few months back, and I caught his talk. He explained how he meets women in the street and leads them back to his place for casual sex. His entire approach was indirect direct. Try talking to Yad for even a few seconds without thinking about sex - you can't! It pours out of him. When he talks to a girl they both know he's initiating something, but he never mentions it, he casually asks them to join him for a drink, casually leads them back to his place, casually invites them up to his room, casually asks them to lie down with him on the bed......
It fun and pressure free for everyone
No tricks, no gimmicks, just incredibly natural, the way sex should be!
I hope this helps clarify the issue somewhat
Good luck guys!
