suggestion needed:how to gain self confidence with women?

[alexxxx]

Hi every body.I think I am good enough to attract girls.I am in shape,athletic,almost good looking,educated,have a good job,young...But I have problem in starting conversation with women.My heart pumps up,my face turn to red,start mumbling and don't know what to say,feel VERY VERY bad and shy when receiving a little scorn or rejection from girls...I used to be a shy person.Using psychological techniques,I become really good in relation with guys or in front of a group of people.So,I think it's time to start improve my relation with women.I think the main problem is low self confidence facing women.Do you agree?If you agree.then what is your suggestion to improve it?If you don't,then what is the main problem in your point of view?Thanks for reading.

[Ghost219]

Mathew Hussey said something that stuck with me. First you do the thing you are scared of and then you get the confidence.
There is no replacement for experience but there are lots of avenues to help you.
Watch the videos and listen to the podcasts on day game lots of advice. Especially in the podcast about gaming solo.
Also look into some hypnotica material he is incredibly inspiring.

Ghost

[MMH]

Mathew Hussey said something that stuck with me. First you do the thing you are scared of and then you get the confidence.

He got that from Three Kings. 

Good advice all the same.

[Yass]

If you're having problems with it then do a bootcamp or something, because sitting around thinking about it is eating time away. I done a bootcamp with Sasha and it was amazing.

[Kaizen]

Hi, it's all about practice. Yes, you will feel uncomfortable. Yes, you will get rejected. But eventually, if you stick to it - and be proud of facing your fears - you WILL improve. A baby who starts to learn to walk....does he ever think "I'm not good enough to walk"? He keeps trying, until he manages to walk. I love this samurai saying: "Fall seven times, get up eight". A bootcamp can definitely kickstart your path to (more) success with women. Do it!

[Gaydame]

One word: practise.

That's it.

And this quote by dear Winnie Churchill:

"Success is the ability to go from one failure to the next with no loss of enthusiasm."

Where you are with the red face and pumping veins right now, I would suggest playing to fail.

[Zapher]

I agree with everything said so far, but let me add to it:
You need to focus on the issue with where you are; You're not getting anywhere like this.
Remember, you've said it yourself, you've got everything going for you.
If you just commit to the opening, and let yourself be happy knowing you're improving simply by trying, you'll be fine.
For now, just concentrate on getting past this initial barrier; the rest will come in time.

Of course, you can always try the 'magic pill' advice:
Go to a busy place like a shopping centre.
For a set amount of time (eg an hour), challenge yourself to greet every person you walk past.
You need to not only greet them, but you MUST also ask them how they are doing in one way or the other.
Trust me, once you've done 10 hours of this you will be FINE approaching strangers.

[Gaydame]

To add a little more... the prolem is that you're thinking about it. You can't think your way out of it because thinking is the cause of it. So you need to act, not think. No hypnosis tapes, no rationalising, no visualisation, no positive thinking, nothing that involves analysing, problem-solving or anything thinking. Just do. Do and fail, but do.

Don't post any more things asking for advice about how to think it away. You can't put out a fire by pouring petrol on it. So just act. Bootcamp, saturday sarge, get a wing man, whatever. This will solve your problems very quickly. Trying to find a solution through reasoning will only add to the problem.

[Pittsy]

Gaydame is spot on. Nothing else to be said; Get out there and start approaching!