I'm stuck, and I really need some help, and advice and guidance, and you seem like a good bloke who might be able to help me find a way out of the maze.
Imagine for one minute, a tennis player - a tennis player who has been learning the game for the last five or so years. This player has studied the winning habits of the world's greatest players, and has gobbled up pearls of wisdom from the greatest tennis coaches on the planet; even the coaches that he thought weren't particularly impressive, this player still listened to in the hope that he might find a morsel of useful advice amongst the mundane and the flimflam that may prove useful in the future.
As a result of all this learning and studying, this player now knows all there is to know about how to become a great tennis champion: he's learnt all the strokes and strategies; he knows all the little tricks he needs to beat players who are bigger, faster and stronger than him; he has learnt to adopt an approach to the game that suits him and, mentally, he is in a different place to where he was five years ago. He is the tennis version on The Terminator. *HOWEVER,* despite all these tools the player has now got at his disposal, he is terrified to even set foot on the tennis court.
Pardon the analogy, my friend, but I just wanted to give you a crystal clear picture of where I've come from in the past five years, and where I am currently at - that is, in short, from picking up Robert Greene's book, 'The Art of Seduction five years ago, I now know just about all there is to know about pick up. However, I just have not been able to find the courage to approach a woman and open her DIRECTLY, which is all I've ever wanted to do. I am sitting here, so disappointed in myself I could cry.
Of course, I can approach INDIRECTLY: I can start conversations with girls in book stores, supermarkets, or at bus stops easily, but they are only ever bullshit small talk conversations where I never show my intent - the sort of conversations you could easily have with your sister, and they end up fizzling out and going nowhere.
I've always been a shy person (although, if you met me, you would think I was the most confident and sociable person on the planet), and just to get even where I am now has been akin to a voyage across the Atlantic in a washing up bowl. To begin with, I tried to get over the initial awkwardness of approaching strangers by just stopping them to ask for directions; I did over *3,000* of these.
Then to push my comfort zones even further, I did a 30 Day Challenge last summer where I approached about 45 girls and went Mode One on them. I thought that if I could do that, then running up to a girl Yad-style and telling her "you look really nice" would be a piece of cake. However, that did not prove to be the case at all. It hardly made a scrap of difference to how anxious I would feel inside.
Today, Tom, I was in town, the weather was beautiful, and the girls were out for the first time this year in their summery clothes, but I just stood there, anchored to the spot, bewildered and mesmerized and terrified. I am prepared to do anything to get good at this - I don't give up easily, but at this point in time I feel stuck, my friend.
Maybe if I had somebody to wing with that would help. However, being older than you, you'll understand that nearly every one of my friends are now married or in long-standing relationships with children of their own - their days of chasing girls now seem a lifetime away.
Of course, I know what would help solve this: taking a bootcamp with your good selves and, if I had that amount of money, I would certainly do so. However, I was seriously ill a few years ago and now only work part-time and so, what with owning my own flat in the current financial climate, money is really tight right now (although I am trying to save for a bootcamp as I need this MORE than a I do a holiday, or the plumbing and heating to be repaired in my flat).
Anyway, Tom, if you've got any practical advice for me, I would really appreciate your input.